Aspiring Bollywood screenwriters attend Inspiration Conference

Hundreds of aspiring Bollywood screenwriters recently attended the 17th annual Screenwriters Inspiration Conference in Mumbai, where they learned that genius is “1% perspiration, 99% inspiration.”

“You cannot avoid perspiration completely,” said keynote speaker Siddharth Anand. “After all, we live in a hot country. You must perspire a little, but everything else is inspiration.”

Anand, who co-wrote the screenplay for Hum Tum after being inspired by When Harry Met Sally, urged the writers not to waste time being original. “Originality is overrated,” he said. “Everything has been done before. But the important thing is, if you are going to be inspired by another movie, pick a good one. Don’t pick a movie with Nicolas Cage in it.”

He urged them not to get discouraged if inspiration doesn’t come to them right away. “As you develop as a screenwriter, you will find yourself being inspired all the time,” he said. “You will be inspired by several movies, which is good because some critics will think you are being original.”

After listening to the keynote speaker, conference attendees were offered a choice of several classes, including “Introduction to Inspiration,” “Intermediate Inspiration,” and “Advanced Inspiration.”

Vidhu Vinod Chopra, director of the blockbuster Munnabhai movies, taught the introductory class and explained the difference between inspiration and plagiarism. “Plagiarism is what you do when you’re a student,” he said. “Inspiration is what you do when you’re a professional.”

He noted that while Munnabhai M.B.B.S. was inspired by Patch Adams, he made enough changes that Hollywood thought it was original and bought the rights to it. Mira Nair is producing the Hollywood version, Gangsta M.D., to be released in 2008. Munnabhai has also been produced in regional languages, such as Tamil and Telegu. “The more you’re inspired,” Chopra said, “the more you inspire.”

New Security Measures Protect America From Doctors

As Britain reels from last week’s foiled terror plots, President Bush has ordered background checks on all doctors and the tightening of security at all clinics and hospitals. Doctors will be subjected to heavy frisking at airports and their baggage will be combed through with help from bomb-sniffing dogs.

“Our country will be safer as a result of these measures,” Bush said. “We are sending a strong message to any doctors who are thinking of bringing harm to Americans.”

British police have arrested eight suspects in connection with the attempted car bombings in London and Glasgow. Among them are at least five doctors, two from India and one each from Iraq, Lebanon and Jordan.

“We are not saying that all doctors are terrorists,” Bush said. “Most of them are fine upstanding citizens.”

To emphasize the point, Bush paid visits to several clinics and hospitals around Washington D.C., where he shook hands with doctors and hugged a few of them. “They’re good people,” he said. “Well, most of them anyway.”

As he was leaving one hospital, Bush posed for a picture with several doctors, then said, “I know you’re all wonderful people. After all, you’ve taken the Hypocritic oath.”

Security expert Ahmed Hussein said the British terror plots will affect not just airport security, but flying in general.

“When someone had a heart attack on a plane, it was common practice for flight attendants to ask, ‘Is there a doctor on the plane?’” he said. “But if they ask that question now, all the other passengers will have heart attacks.”